transcock capsule
Record: 9-0 (Sacred Heart: W 5-3, W 14-0, W 8-0, @ Winthrop: W 5-3, Queens: W 7-2, Milwaukee: W 5-2, W 6-3, W 14-4, GWU: W 14-4)
Offense: .304, 12 HR, 18/20 steals
Pitching: 2.25, 105/23 K:BB
Fielding: .980
After failing to land a candidate from the preferred tier list, ostensibly a reasonably aged one at that, our dimwitted rivals in Columbia sure are proud to have college baseball luminary Paul Mainieri as the new coach. He’s “new” only to that dump as hiring him was akin to bringing Bobby Bowden out of retirement five years after he hung ‘em up at FSU and that after running the program down as well. The only thing that may have excited their fans more would have been if someone figured out a way to reanimate Augie Garrido as the first Frankenstein coach in college baseball history. Idiots.
The transfer portal is way of life in contemporary college athletics but this operation is something well beyond the pale: if it weren’t for the portal and Monte’s past recruiting relationships with Clemson’s roster would they even be able to field a team?
Six of nine projected starting batters and six additional pitchers, including the Friday starter and closer, were not originally recruited to the armpit of the South. Are the two most athletic transcock players in 2025 actually Clemson cast-offs? Sure looks that way.
The starting CF, who will be referred to herein as “Dawn Staley’s lawn boy” or simply “lawn boy”, and the starting 2B, who still cannot field, and known as “der grillmeister”, both played for a real program last year but left because they can’t cut it on a legitimate roster.
Other notable transcocks include Kennedy Jones (UNC-G) in year two, Jase Woita (Kansas City C.C.) who is admittedly hot out of the gate despite looking like a typical Mike Martin butterball, Dalton Mashore (St. Mary’s), and Henry Kaczmar which is of course Polish for “cock-smooch”. I considered that may be a bit too crass, even for me, but he is a transcock from Ohio State so, I mean, perfectly applicable, right?
For the third year in a row, the most dangerous hitter is JR 1B Ethan Petry and we should make a note of that and continuously consult that note. This is the one batter that you must not allow to beat you. The aforementioned Woita has been a productive DH and lawn boy and grillmeister have been good for them early on. Where would you be without us?
The pitching rotation is up in the air with presumed Friday starter RHP Dylan Eskew pulled from his last outing after only two ineffective innings with a stated back strain. If he is unable to go it appears the two lefties, SR Matthew Becker and SO Jake McCoy, may both push up a day. Each are tough from the left side but their cartoonish strikeout-to-walk numbers reflect the competition as much as their performance.
Closer Brendan Sweeney, a JR RHP transcock from Blinn C.C., famous as the conduit for Cam Newton, has three saves already. They needed to save three games against their schedule to date? Weak.
The available arms tilt very right-handed, especially in the bullpen, so I’d expect to see lefties SO Ashton Crowther (Miami FL), JR Jarvis Evans (Georgia) and JR Jackson Soucie (Wabash) situationally even though Soucie started the midweek game and Evans relieved him. Neither threw many pitches.
Final sidenote on the pitching staff: Tennessee transfer Wyatt Evans, coveted here due to high velo in the offseason, has yet to pitch for the clucks this year. He has an injury history and I am not sure if he’s healthy but thought it was interesting that he has not appeared for whatever reason.
scar fields well at .980 with, no surprise here, der grillmeister committing the most frequents boots to this point.
Projected line-up
Key reserves
Pitching Probables
Closer
Bullpen
Weather looks good for Friday and Saturday with cooling temps after sunset Friday and perhaps some wind on Saturday playing a factor. Sunday unfortunately will be much colder which means playing the game at 5:00 makes even less sense. Do they really think the “mystique” of night baseball at shitbox stadium means that much? It doesn’t, it’ll just be that much colder which by that point would suit me fine to be adding insult to injury for their fans to sit there freezing while we whip their ass. Go ahead home and burn some tires for heat.
There are a lot of variables that make considering what to expect this weekend difficult: rivalry, three games across three different venues, whether or not the transcocks can keep up against their first real opposition of the season and then there is Clemson’s pitching, both who is available and how they perform. The Tigers are certainly hoping the opener in Arlington pays quick dividends this weekend having set them up as the better prepared team.
Clemson clearly has the talent and ability to win these games, and every game, but we can't lose sight of the fact that this team nonetheless stinks and will probably only win if the opponent is having an off day.
Record: 9-0 (Sacred Heart: W 5-3, W 14-0, W 8-0, @ Winthrop: W 5-3, Queens: W 7-2, Milwaukee: W 5-2, W 6-3, W 14-4, GWU: W 14-4)
Offense: .304, 12 HR, 18/20 steals
Pitching: 2.25, 105/23 K:BB
Fielding: .980
After failing to land a candidate from the preferred tier list, ostensibly a reasonably aged one at that, our dimwitted rivals in Columbia sure are proud to have college baseball luminary Paul Mainieri as the new coach. He’s “new” only to that dump as hiring him was akin to bringing Bobby Bowden out of retirement five years after he hung ‘em up at FSU and that after running the program down as well. The only thing that may have excited their fans more would have been if someone figured out a way to reanimate Augie Garrido as the first Frankenstein coach in college baseball history. Idiots.
The transfer portal is way of life in contemporary college athletics but this operation is something well beyond the pale: if it weren’t for the portal and Monte’s past recruiting relationships with Clemson’s roster would they even be able to field a team?
Six of nine projected starting batters and six additional pitchers, including the Friday starter and closer, were not originally recruited to the armpit of the South. Are the two most athletic transcock players in 2025 actually Clemson cast-offs? Sure looks that way.
The starting CF, who will be referred to herein as “Dawn Staley’s lawn boy” or simply “lawn boy”, and the starting 2B, who still cannot field, and known as “der grillmeister”, both played for a real program last year but left because they can’t cut it on a legitimate roster.
Other notable transcocks include Kennedy Jones (UNC-G) in year two, Jase Woita (Kansas City C.C.) who is admittedly hot out of the gate despite looking like a typical Mike Martin butterball, Dalton Mashore (St. Mary’s), and Henry Kaczmar which is of course Polish for “cock-smooch”. I considered that may be a bit too crass, even for me, but he is a transcock from Ohio State so, I mean, perfectly applicable, right?
For the third year in a row, the most dangerous hitter is JR 1B Ethan Petry and we should make a note of that and continuously consult that note. This is the one batter that you must not allow to beat you. The aforementioned Woita has been a productive DH and lawn boy and grillmeister have been good for them early on. Where would you be without us?
The pitching rotation is up in the air with presumed Friday starter RHP Dylan Eskew pulled from his last outing after only two ineffective innings with a stated back strain. If he is unable to go it appears the two lefties, SR Matthew Becker and SO Jake McCoy, may both push up a day. Each are tough from the left side but their cartoonish strikeout-to-walk numbers reflect the competition as much as their performance.
Closer Brendan Sweeney, a JR RHP transcock from Blinn C.C., famous as the conduit for Cam Newton, has three saves already. They needed to save three games against their schedule to date? Weak.
The available arms tilt very right-handed, especially in the bullpen, so I’d expect to see lefties SO Ashton Crowther (Miami FL), JR Jarvis Evans (Georgia) and JR Jackson Soucie (Wabash) situationally even though Soucie started the midweek game and Evans relieved him. Neither threw many pitches.
Final sidenote on the pitching staff: Tennessee transfer Wyatt Evans, coveted here due to high velo in the offseason, has yet to pitch for the clucks this year. He has an injury history and I am not sure if he’s healthy but thought it was interesting that he has not appeared for whatever reason.
scar fields well at .980 with, no surprise here, der grillmeister committing the most frequents boots to this point.
Projected line-up
| CF | R/R | JR | 0.433 | 2 | 10 | 4 of 4 | Clemson | |
| DH | Jase Woita | L/R | JR | 0.444 | 3 | 8 | Kansas City C.C. | |
| 1B | Ethan Petry | R/R | JR | 0.452 | 2 | 10 | ||
| LF | Kennedy Jones | R/R | SR | 0.290 | 1 | 5 | UNC-G | |
| C | Talmadge LeCroy | R/R | SR | 0.056 | 0 | 3 | ||
| 2B | R/R | *SO | 0.350 | 1 | 6 | 2 of 2 | Clemson | |
| RF | Dalton Mashore | R/R | SR | 0.316 | 0 | 1 | 3 of 4 | St. Mary's |
| SS | Henry Kaczmar | L/R | JR | 0.172 | 0 | 3 | Ohio State | |
| 3B | KJ Scobey | R/R | FR | 0.269 | 1 | 5 |
Key reserves
| Evan Stone | R/R | SR | 0.167 | 0 | 1 | |||
| Will Tippett | S/R | JR | 0.444 | 0 | 2 | |||
| Blake Jackson | L/L | *SR | 0.200 | 0 | 2 | Charlotte | ||
| Ryan Bakes | R/R | SO | 0.111 | 1 | 4 | |||
| Max Kaufer | R/R | JR | 0.333 | 1 | 1 | Texas A&M |
Pitching Probables
| SP1 | Dylan Eskew | RHP | SR | 0-0 | 2.57 | 7.0 | 4 | 11 | 0.125 | Chipola JC |
| SP2 | Matthew Becker | LHP | SR | 2-0 | 1.59 | 11.1 | 0 | 17 | 0.105 | |
| SP3 | Jake McCoy | LHP | SO | 1-0 | 3.00 | 9.0 | 4 | 17 | 0.067 |
Closer
| CL | Brendan Sweeney | RHP | JR | 0-0 | 0.00 | 3.1 | 1 | 4 | 3 saves | Blinn C.C. |
Bullpen
| RP | Tyler Pitzer | RHP | SO | 1-0 | 2.84 | 6.1 | 5 | 11 | ||
| RP | Parker Marlatt | RHP | SO | 1-0 | 0.00 | 4.2 | 1 | 6 | 0.176 | |
| RP | Brandon Stone | RHP | SO | 1-0 | 1.42 | 6.1 | 1 | 4 | 0.182 | Johnson County C.C. |
| RP | Ryder Garino | RHP | FR | 1-0 | 0.00 | 6.0 | 1 | 9 | 0.053 | |
| RP | Zach Russell | RHP | FR | 0-0 | 0.00 | 3.2 | 1 | 6 | 0.154 | |
| RP | Ashton Crowther | LHP | *SO | 1-0 | 3.38 | 5.1 | 1 | 7 | 0.111 | Miami (FL) |
| RP | Jarvis Evans | LHP | JR | 1-0 | 8.44 | 5.1 | 0 | 6 | Georgia | |
| RP | Jackson Soucie | LHP | JR | 0-0 | 1.80 | 5.0 | 2 | 4 | 0.167 | Wabash Valley C.C. |
Weather looks good for Friday and Saturday with cooling temps after sunset Friday and perhaps some wind on Saturday playing a factor. Sunday unfortunately will be much colder which means playing the game at 5:00 makes even less sense. Do they really think the “mystique” of night baseball at shitbox stadium means that much? It doesn’t, it’ll just be that much colder which by that point would suit me fine to be adding insult to injury for their fans to sit there freezing while we whip their ass. Go ahead home and burn some tires for heat.
There are a lot of variables that make considering what to expect this weekend difficult: rivalry, three games across three different venues, whether or not the transcocks can keep up against their first real opposition of the season and then there is Clemson’s pitching, both who is available and how they perform. The Tigers are certainly hoping the opener in Arlington pays quick dividends this weekend having set them up as the better prepared team.
Clemson clearly has the talent and ability to win these games, and every game, but we can't lose sight of the fact that this team nonetheless stinks and will probably only win if the opponent is having an off day.
